IN YOUR JUDGEMENT

                In your judgement

I wrote the story, the story that you read.

About how I loved too much and was happy before love got sour.

How I got my heart broken.. feels the pain through my veins in every breath I take.

Lives in the memories of my past lover, the memories that torment me

The story of how I can’t live without him

One of my life as a mess over betrayal

A story of my defense,

Of how I am unable to love again.

You wondered how I could write such a piece so sad about my private life for the public to read.

A story of how I lost touch of reality, of all around me but once he quit, reality   blew me so hard

You judged me, mocked me,

You cried and sobbed at times

You looked at me in different dimensions, you felt pain through your soul to your toes.

It sounded like it was my true life story, that I was narrating on a paper.

It hit your mind like I was experiencing what you are going through at the moment.

Reading your heart secrets and desires.

The story that you felt like it talked of my past and current situation

On one end, you pitied me, you comforted me, you sympathized with the writer.

Your right eye saw an attention seeker, you comprehended I should keep my shit to myself,

At times, you reflected it was wise I shared my feelings, betrayal and rejection.

“Even in the arms of a new lover, I will always feel like am cheating on you.”

You concluded that was you.

It is okay I know you did much more than these,

What you didn’t know in your judgement was, you were the girl I was talking about. It is you who defends yourself on claims of heartbreak…..,

Yes, the piece is about you, the man reading this, 

reflecting of how you killed her dreams,

The girl in your mind right now,, that story is her confession

Broke her heart, watched her bleed to unconsciousness…

In your judgement, saying the author is nagging

Just know that everybody has gone through something that has changed them in a way they can never go back to the person they were before.

The most important part of communication is hearing what isn’t said and reading what isn't written. Never give any soul the pleasure of seeing you down;  not even a single being, Just like I did to your misjudgment. Learn rewarding loyalty with loyalty and disloyalty with distance. 

You must accept you are sick to heal

Mar19
Are you struggling with rejection or betrayal, both or more than the two?..You ain’t alone,,

Are you struggling with rejection or betrayal, both or more than the two? You ain't alone....

Take a deep breath, you may be at the door step,,others have gone too deep with this,,when I met Josh this morning, he looked like he has had enough of it and was opting for a rest..

This young boy was contemplating on murder or suicide.. ” I either die or she dies, it’s all my choice” he said as he leaned against a coconut tree along the beach

Looking at his face he had a symbol on his forehead, it was more than a normal frown***

 He had dated a lady he trusted for 2 years for he recalls how the two lovebirds by then met…

 Sometimes ladies react faster than a mixture of chlorine and hydrogen… Corroding your soul to your toes. He always trusted she would be the mother to his fantasized babies after saying “yes I do” 

She walked out of his life as if she was alighting a matatu.. Carelessly, she rudely texted #its over between us.

Just like that? I mean after a period worth a gestation period of an infant elephant!!

Whats is wrong with ladies??! 

He had begun Smoking weed before graduating to cocaine and was now mastering in local brews .. 

Just like a pastoralist, the well was drying up and looking for greaner pasture was his gone girl’s routine. .She had ripped his humble pockets off .. 

It all starts with drinking coffee before snorting it,

Come out of that shell,,,, you got a better life than this… 

 You are beyond torture don’t jump from a bleeding heart to a destroyed lung and kidney failure…

I have always maintained that the biblical man is a more animal than the real animal … Only animals can do such toxic things….

Like  who died and recruited her in the zoo

If your partner starts acting weirdly consistently,it is evident that you are zoned… you better take a U- turn , fasten your seat belt in the already predicted zone 

and  drive your heart safely home,,far away from drama and increased heartbeat rates…

You must accept you are sick for you to heal……

Just for your information.

May12

My Dear Ex-lover
I had no reason to insinuate what I did, my only excuse would be that my preferences changed, which is no excuse at all

Please try and think that I didn’t break your heart. Am sorry. I would not have hurt you above all in the world. Say that you forgive me..

                                Freed Mind. S

I had never felt apologetic before, 

He was the reason I fell in love and he’s the reason I quit and question what love is ..probably what love was when I fell in it. Four years ago is the answer to the last time I saw him..

I remember when he said he had a million reasons for loving me,,,,  on my side my heart had found solace,, I would sing with the heavens…

  my heart has found a resting place°°°°,,, not in device nor creed, I trust in Ever….. (All  words twisted for him)

 When reasons for loving are countable like a million in number, they will run out, for they can end because they did, to me

When you need love but all you get is sympathy!!!! Despite millions of reasons., countable things end.   ..

Am done with you …. When you rob Peter to pay Paul and Peter knows,,, he gets mad ..  Am mad at the fact that you robbed me off my heart and fed it with sympathy,,, my heart is now malnourished.

  Being Peter, all I had was stolen for some petty club girl trying some bargained flimsy tangled Brazilian weave …

Say you forgive my walking away for time has come…. If apology is accepted or not, none will change my decision…

It was just for your information,,, 

 when he treats you like a guitar,, strumming you to his tune only to drop you after.. Be a song bird , dance to the rhythm making clear the lyrics…

So many toys to play with but a man chooses your feelings???! 

Free yourself from play zone, feed your heart with self love and move on..